This post is an effort to provide clarity & direction, hope & empowerment for those who are making every effort to attract healthy emotional/sexual relationships... and who find that in spite of their best efforts... they continue to attract the same partner in a different package. (Of course, this post should also prove useful for those who continue to be hired by the same abusive employer, indifferent corporation, or those who keep hitting the same dead end in any area of life.)
While it is true that there are many wonderful therapies to address the mind, and many excellent modalities to physically treat the emotional body.. the human energy body is often overlooked in the process of healing & self transformation. This simple omission can be the cause of tremendous suffering, and an abject lowering of self esteem. Why? Because in spite of all best efforts mentally and emotionally.. even physically in terms of "make overs".. weight loss, body building, new hair styles, new wardrobe.... we remain vibrational creatures. We can become attuned, or accustomed to a certain type of energy environment.
Observing the world around us, we may often wonder why a very lovely woman continues to attract abusive partners, or why a charming & successful man always finds himself with an alcoholic lover. The answer is often that women was raised in an abusive home environment, and unknowingly, energetically, she is sending out "signals" that this type of environment is comfortable to her, thus attracting a partner who prefers to create abusive environment and those who accept that condition.
The successful man most likely had a primary childhood relationship with one or more alcoholic family members, and finds that on some non-verbal level, the energy of alcoholic homes is strangely comfortable in all its chaos.
While this may seem illogical, or far-fetched, and one might reason that no thinking person would constantly make these same dead end choices over and over... the key concept of this article is that the situations described above are not "thinking" problems, they are not the result of "rational" decisions. They are more like falling down a manhole you didn't see coming because you were distracted.
Please allow me to illustrate with a primitive, yet hopefully effective example from nature. If you go scuba diving off the Great Barrier Reef with any three people in the world... any three, and one of you accidentally swims too close to the coral reef, tears your wet suit, scrapes your flesh & begins to bleed into the water... then, no matter who tore the suit, what they believe in, where they came from, how hard they tried to become a brilliant scuba diver, how many lessons they took.. how desperately they wanted to scuba dive happily ever after... there is now blood in the water.
As a result of that simple change in the great ocean, apex predators from a distance as great as 100 miles, sensing that change in their environment, will come to investigate. The Great White Shark doesn't really care who is bleeding, and perhaps thrashing about in the water. It is behaving as it must, responding as it is conditioned to, or created to. It, or perhaps they, are coming to see what might be for dinner.
As a healthy human being... anticipating the possible approach of the apex predator.. you must make some decisions. The healthy decision is to get out of that water. Then, definitely, repair the wet suit, tend your wound (STOP BLEEDING), wait until the wound is healed and the sharks are long gone before getting back into the water to finish your swim. All these actions take time and effort, and yet they are all life saving.
I think it is important to note that the scuba diver did not intend to attract a Great White Shark. The diver was just being a little careless, or a show off, or just scared silly of scuba diving, we don't know. And it doesn't benefit us to blame the diver.
Sometimes after a failed relationship, people don't want to get out the water, tend their wounds, and get new wet suits. People often want to jump right back into the dating game and try again to find that perfect partner. Now, none of us would want to jump into bloody water filled with sharks.......however, because in western culture in particular, we are not trained to view our world as an energy environment, nor ourselves as vibrational creatures.. the idea of mastering the dating game with our wits, or charm, or planning, or effective choice making, or our list... seems perfectly reasonable.
The point is, that all hurtful relationships affect us energetically, leaving marks, or tears, or wounds or stains in our energy bodies, or auras. Healthy loving relationships also affect our energy bodies causing them to be brighter, and more resiliant and lovely. All these changes are happening all the time. But repeated kinds of negative relationship begin to leave deeper and deeper grooves in our "energy record". These wounds can't be healed with words, or clothes, or make overs, or new lovers. They must be healed with "energy medicine".
I will post more observations on energy healing and healthy relationships in the near future. For now, should you care to comment, or to ask questions, please feel welcome to use this blog as a forum to share with others. Wishing you peace, Ann George. Usui Reiki Master & Energy Healer